C.D. Warner, et al., comp.
The Library of the World’s Best Literature. An Anthology in Thirty Volumes. 1917.

A Feast

By Joel Barlow (1754–1812)

From ‘Hasty Pudding’

There are various ways of preparing and eating Hasty Pudding, with molasses, butter, sugar, cream, and fried. Why so excellent a thing cannot be eaten alone? Nothing is perfect alone; even man, who boasts of so much perfection, is nothing without his fellow-substance. In eating, beware of the lurking heat that lies deep in the mass; dip your spoon gently, take shallow dips and cool it by degrees. It is sometimes necessary to blow. This is indicated by certain signs which every experienced feeder knows. They should be taught to young beginners. I have known a child’s tongue blistered for want of this attention, and then the school-dame would insist that the poor thing had told a lie. A mistake: the falsehood was in the faithless pudding. A prudent mother will cool it for her child with her own sweet breath. The husband, seeing this, pretends his own wants blowing, too, from the same lips. A sly deceit of love. She knows the cheat, but, feigning ignorance, lends her pouting lips and gives a gentle blast, which warms the husband’s heart more than it cools his pudding.

THE DAYS grow short; but though the falling sun

To the glad swain proclaims his day’s work done,

Night’s pleasing shades his various tasks prolong,

And yield new subjects to my various song.

For now, the corn-house filled, the harvest home,

The invited neighbors to the husking come;

A frolic scene, where work and mirth and play

Unite their charms to chase the hours away.

Where the huge heap lies centred in the hall,

The lamp suspended from the cheerful wall,

Brown corn-fed nymphs, and strong hard-handed beaux,

Alternate ranged, extend in circling rows,

Assume their seats, the solid mass attack;

The dry husks rustle, and the corn-cobs crack;

The song, the laugh, alternate notes resound,

And the sweet cider trips in silence round.

The laws of husking every wight can tell;

And sure, no laws he ever keeps so well:

For each red ear a general kiss he gains,

With each smut ear he smuts the luckless swains;

But when to some sweet maid a prize is cast,

Red as her lips, and taper as her waist,

She walks the round, and culls one favored beau,

Who leaps, the luscious tribute to bestow.

Various the sport, as are the wits and brains

Of well-pleased lasses and contending swains;

Till the vast mound of corn is swept away,

And he that gets the last ear wins the day.

Meanwhile the housewife urges all her care,

The well-earned feast to hasten and prepare.

The sifted meal already waits her hand,

The milk is strained, the bowls in order stand,

The fire flames high; and as a pool (that takes

The headlong stream that o’er the mill-dam breaks)

Foams, roars, and rages with incessant toils,

So the vexed caldron rages, roars and boils.

First with clean salt she seasons well the food,

Then strews the flour, and thickens well the flood.

Long o’er the simmering fire she lets it stand;

To stir it well demands a stronger hand:

The husband takes his turn, and round and round

The ladle flies; at last the toil is crowned;

When to the board the thronging huskers pour,

And take their seats as at the corn before.

I leave them to their feast. There still belong

More useful matters to my faithful song.

For rules there are, though ne’er unfolded yet,

Nice rules and wise, how pudding should be ate.

Some with molasses grace the luscious treat,

And mix, like bards, the useful and the sweet;

A wholesome dish, and well deserving praise,

A great resource in those bleak wintry days,

When the chilled earth lies buried deep in snow,

And raging Boreas dries the shivering cow.

Blest cow! thy praise shall still my notes employ,

Great source of health, the only source of joy;

Mother of Egypt’s god, but sure, for me,

Were I to leave my God, I’d worship thee.

How oft thy teats these pious hands have pressed!

How oft thy bounties prove my only feast!

How oft I’ve fed thee with my favorite grain!

And roared, like thee, to see thy children slain.

Ye swains who know her various worth to prize,

Ah! house her well from winter’s angry skies.

Potatoes, pumpkins, should her sadness cheer,

Corn from your crib, and mashes from your beer;

When spring returns, she’ll well acquit the loan,

And nurse at once your infants and her own.

Milk, then, with pudding I should always choose;

To this in future I confine my muse,

Till she in haste some further hints unfold,

Good for the young, nor useless to the old.

First in your bowl the milk abundant take,

Then drop with care along the silver lake

Your flakes of pudding: these at first will hide

Their little bulk beneath the swelling tide;

But when their growing mass no more can sink,

When the soft island looms above the brink,

Then check your hand; you’ve got the portion due,

So taught my sire, and what he taught is true.

There is a choice in spoons. Though small appear

The nice distinction, yet to me ’tis clear.

The deep-bowled Gallic spoon, contrived to scoop

In ample draughts the thin diluted soup,

Performs not well in those substantial things,

Whose mass adhesive to the metal clings;

Where the strong labial muscles must embrace

The gentle curve, and sweep the hollow space.

With ease to enter and discharge the freight,

A bowl less concave, but still more dilate,

Becomes the pudding best. The shape, the size,

A secret rests, unknown to vulgar eyes.

Experienced feeders can alone impart

A rule so much above the lore of art.

These tuneful lips that thousand spoons have tried,

With just precision could the point decide,

Though not in song—the muse but poorly shines

In cones, and cubes, and geometric lines;

Yet the true form, as near as she can tell,

Is that small section of a goose-egg shell,

Which in two equal portions shall divide

The distance from the centre to the side.

Fear not to slaver; ’tis no deadly sin;—

Like the free Frenchman, from your joyous chin

Suspend the ready napkin; or like me,

Poise with one hand your bowl upon your knee;

Just in the zenith your wise head project,

Your full spoon rising in a line direct,

Bold as a bucket, heed no drops that fall,

The wide-mouthed bowl will surely catch them all!

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